Fresno in mouth disease

I wrote the following story in response to a contest that Fresno Famous is currently having. All you have to do is create an account at Fresno Famous then blog a story about sometime you put your foot in your mouth, then you'll likely win tickets to see the Dixie Chicks in Fresno. Details can be found HERE.

Now I'm not a big country music fan, but free tickets are free tickets. Here is the story I told:

It was approximately 1993 and I was drunk. Before heading out to a Black Fry show at the Wild Blue (the vacant building behind Million Elephant for those who don’t remember), I lost in a game of quarters…badly. I’m pretty sure I ended up having ten of the twelve Keystone Lights my friends and I started the game with – I know, Keystone Light is barely beer but it was dirt cheap for college idiots.

So, off we go into The Wild Blue. The opening band was Brothers Patchwork. I had never seen them before but I knew of them since a friend in my music class at F.C.C. was friends with the singer. The Brothers Patchwork finishes their, apparently bad, set. I say apparently because I remember being unimpressed but, being so hammered, I don’t remember why.

Between sets, one of the members of Black Fry is on stage and calls out to the crowd “Give it up for Brothers Patchwork guys, they were great." Then, totally out of character for me (drunk or not), I scream out “Brothers Patchwork SUCKS!"

Then, there's a tap on my right shoulder from a man who says to me “Brothers Patchwork what now?" Yes, of course, it was the lead singer of Brothers Patchwork. Unnoticed by my drunk-ass, he was standing behind me the whole time, talking to my friend sitting next to me.

I apologized up and down and told him I was just drunk and to please just ignore me. The damaged was already done though. He just reluctantly shook my hand and walked away without saying anything. I felt smaller than the restroom at Zapps Park.

The next Monday in music class, I told my friend what had happened and how lousy I felt. He told me, “That’s funny because I talked to him [Brothers Patchwork singer] on Sunday and he didn’t tell me about that, but he did tell me his set sucked."

Local Tower Music

Well, as you all know, Tower Records is sadly going away. Along with it, is Tower's "local section" and the convenience of buying a local disc along with the latest Red Hot Chili Peppers or one of the near countless magazines Tower has...sorry, had.

What can replace this? Can FTK or Spinners pick up the slack? Or, Maybe Roy Nichols or Dave Remus could open up a small music store. A store like the one that used to be in the old Cost Plus shopping center (Shaw and Fresno) then moved to Bullard and Fresno.

How about you? Just do it! Open one up. I'm too broke and dumb to do it - I would fill the store with rare Van Halen singles that would never sell. Maybe a Fresno Famous music store...

Get Fuzzed Fresno Bee

Dorktown begins video blogging with a straight shot at The Fresno Bee - they are going to be feeling it from this dork for weeks, man

COPS: CURRY VILLAGE

Have you ever stayed at Yosemite's Curry Village? The tents, the vista's, the pizza and beer.

I recently stayed in the Curry tents (way overpriced) and they wouldn't be that bad if they weren't so close together. The person in the next tent is like two feet away and you can hear all kinds of things: snoring, farting and things even more un-savory...like singing.

You can also hear people getting arrested while trying to leave the Curry Village Bar-the only real hot night spot in Yosemite, by the way.

Check out some bad video (rarely does the video get focused) that Dorktown got while in Curry Village this past weekend:



**Also, this blog is on Fresno Famous.